The choices we make based on that information is the next step.  Mind you, I am certainly not promoting perfection or idealism here.  It is completely important to have flexibility and fluidity, especially with diet and lifestyle.  In fact, the rigid voice inside that allows for zero wiggle room, may not be the voice to ultimately listen to or take at face value.  

The perfectionist inside is not the boss, she is just highlighting how we’ve tried to manage our fear and vulnerability. Conscious wellness is not about living and eating perfectly.  It is about knowing yourself and honoring that relationship.Going out to dinner and having some wine with friends might be totally worth it for the positive benefits of social time and fun and laughter.  It might be completely appropriate to do this and take the cost that a few drinks might do to our health to have the benefit of a good time.  But maybe this isn’t the rule because there might be a day where physically you are already stressed, say from too little sleep or not enough nutrients, or exposure to illnesses or other stressors.  In that case, the cost might not be worth the drinks.  So you see, we are not static either and it is always worth it to take account of the context of things, rather than make decisions or “rules” in a vacuum and call that health.

Building trust with ourselves is an ongoing dynamic willingness to relate to ourselves.It is the opportunity to master ourselves in relationship to whatever task the world offers us, from the very small choices to the very big challenges.  Who we are is a fluid, breathing organism, affecting and being effected by the environment in which we live.  We are not meant to master each task with perfection like some outdated achievement model.  We are meant to discover who we are, and to continue exploring the depths of our Being, so that we can ultimately be living in a harmonious way.  Through listening inwardly, we build trust in who we are and choose ever more subtly this deeper alignment.  

Conscious Wellness isn’t about having perfect bodies, or even perfect health.  It is about really and truly being yourself, at the deepest level you can and being willing to continue on, as Rumi says, “to flow down and down into ever widening rings of being.”

This means becoming conscious of our motivations, impulses, insecurities, needs, feelings, wants, passions and concerns.  

The more we become aware of ourselves, the more we can develop a relationship of listening to ourselves with compassion and understanding.  This willingness to hear our own needs and responses to life gives us a unique position to respond to ourselves with great care.  Indeed, we have the opportunity in self-reflection to respond to ourselves the way we may have always wished others would respond to us.  

Building a caring relationship with our self is an empowering action and a foundational step towards conscious wellness. Within a loving and kind relationship, the true self naturally emerges.We no longer need to maintain defenses or coping mechanisms from the past to avoid looking at our self.  In the presence of a loving other, we can begin to get to know the truth about what we need, and what our own wellness goals really are in this moment.  

Because we are dynamic, alive beings, these needs and goals are rarely static, but more evolving and deepening over time. Building skills to self-reflect with compassion and curiosity, rather than criticism, invites more of our self to emerge and sets a trusting precedent with ourselves that reinforces the self-reciprocity inherent in listening to our bodies, emotions, and thoughts with respect and then responding accordingly.

This emergent autonomy strengthens over time an inner locus of control, which basically means that you become the expert on you.Being the expert on yourself does not mean dismissing other points of view, feedback, or medical information at all.  

It means incorporating your own voice into the discussion of your health.  Too easily we have signed over that voice to a new fad diet, or our friends exercise routines, or other advice that in truth, may or may not be the right fit.  Just because it works for another does not mean it will work for you.  This is the value of self-reflection and building a wellness autonomy.  Only you know your body- how your digestion feels, how your joints feel, what level of concentration is normal for you, how you are enjoying or not enjoying your life and able to see the beauty within it.  These are all indicators of wellness and very unique to each individual.